Julie's Journal

Working, sleeping, cleaning, hanging out with the boyz, spending time with Michael…the days go by. I called my coordinator Debbie today with my concerns of waiting so long for an appointment. She told me that two surgeons had quit last month, and they are not going to be able to replace them until next month. That leaves them with two other surgeons picking up the slack.

She said that she has several patients in the same boat as I am, and she feels horrible about it, as she knows we need to be seen. She said the only good advice she had for me was to write a letter to member services of my insurance company and file a complaint. She said it probably won�t make a difference for me, but if enough people complain it may help future breast patients. I may do that.

My mom and Leo will be here on Saturday through Labor Day. That should take my mind off things I hope.

Hey! Cool! The surgeon called and I got my appointment for

3 WEEKS

from today.

I’m not happy, and I just want to crawl into bed and sleep the rest of the day. Is it 5:00PM yet?

I’m in shock. You guys mean the world to me. It feels so wonderful knowing I have this “cheerleading” squad behind me, praying and keeping me sane with all the nice comments. No matter where we are on the internet it seems we will always stay connected as we all once were. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I talked to the surgeon’s office today and they have all the reports, referrals, paperwork, films, and my first born (eyeroll) to schedule my appointment with him. The scheduling nurse told me that the surgeon needs to go through all the referral paperwork and that I am to call them tomorrow for my appointment time.

I know I said I was calm, cool, and collected on Tuesday. Now I am just anxious as all hell and I want to see the doctor. I want answers, and I want them now!

All of you really know how to make a girl feel the love. I genuinely enjoy seeing the comments from some of you that I haven’t heard from in ages (and of course the ones I talk to daily). I don’t know where you are hanging out, but I am glad to see that you are still around. I would love to talk with you all again. I do try to catch up on all your blogs when I get the chance. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the positive thoughts and prayers.

I picked up my films today from radiology to take to the surgeon. I tried and tried not to open them and take a peek, but I couldn’t resist. The large envelope was all taped up and didn’t appear to be peeker friendly but I said screw it and ripped it open.

Inside the envelope was my films from last July (2004) and the films from this year. I looked a little bit, but really didn’t understand what I was looking at…or looking for. Part of me wanted to see something that was so obvious to the naked eye, and part of me didn’t want to understand any of it. I guess the latter part of me worked.

I am waiting for the referral to go through to the surgeon so I can have the biopsy and get the results. Normally I would be freaking out about the wait, but I am so calm and composed. I think I am more troubled about my docile behavior than the actual outcome of the biopsy.

I took a day off from work today for a little self realization and reflection. HA! HA! Whateverthehell that means…

I got my results from my squish and my ultrasound today. It’s pretty neat as it’s online and you can read the radiology report.

I have three large Category 4b (Ultrasound BIRADS Chart 50 – 89% to be moderately suspicious maligancies).

Right – 5.1 x 5.2 x 3.5 cm
Left – 4.3 x 3.8 x 3.5 cm and 3.6 x 3.2 x 1.4 cm

My doctor put in a referral to the Breast Cancer Clinic here in Las Vegas and they will be doing the follow up biopsies to confirm or deny what the ultrasound found. I should know more next week.

Thanks for the hugs and good thoughts in my comments Keep praying!